Then, Before and Then again
by LovelyBirdcherry
Summary: They just wanted to have a proper meeting. They didn't want to listen behind doors to the crudest lust proclamation ever from Sasuke to Naruto nonetheless. But did that really happen? Language,Yaoi


It was relatively peaceful day in Hokage office. Tsunade had planned a brief meeting to inform everyone about their success in a fight against Lighting country. Just a few more missions were in order to bring the Rain down and then everyone can have a much deserved vacation. A lot of Jounins and ANBU already were here. The only ones missing were Naruto and Sasuke.

Tsunade impatiently tapped her fingers against the table. She really was holding her anger in check but she never dealt with Naruto very calmly.

"Ah, finally!" Kakashi said. Yes, Kakashi, even he was relatively on time. Well, he arrived 5 minutes ago which made him be only 45 minutes late. It must be a record.

His words were in reference to the noises he, with his super hearing, heard.

And soon others heard it too: Sasuke's voice.

They didn't really understand what he was saying because Sasuke was strangely emotional in his speech.

Then the foot steps stopped outside the door of Hokage's office and they could hear what Sasuke was saying more clearly.

„…understand?"

"I think." The voice definitely belonged to one Uzumaki Naruto.

"Okay, here it goes," stated Sasuke's calm voice before getting really emotional again. Well, not that emotional but for Sasuke it was.

"Oh Naruto, I love you so much, I'll be the best hole you ever stuffed your penis, I'll drop to my knees and please you until I faint. Just say a word and I'll be yours!"

Everyone froze over more or less visibly.

Naruto must have let out a quiet chuckle (out of nervousness?) but Sasuke didn't let that stop him until he has finished saying what he wanted. "Tonight, tomorrow, the day after tomorrow, forever! I don't care if I'm not the only one. Hell, I don't care if you spit at me!"

Naruto let out a low whistle. "That desperate?" he asked.

Everyone in the office thought the same.

"All I care for is that you let me be by your side." Sasuke paused for a second. "I'll do ANYTHING!"

Now was the breaking point. Realization hit them hard. Was Sasuke... was Sasuke…?

They didn't know what to even think.

Sure, Tsunade thought, the two of them bring load of surprises but…this?

"Wow." It was Naruto. After a short while he said quickly and surely: "No, no, no, no, no, no, Sasuke, never!" Naruto shouted with nervous laughter sometimes.

This alerted half of the guests (former rookie 9 + Gai team and all senseis plus several people that are OC). Did Naruto do what they think he did? Surely Naruto wasn't that cruel.

They knew Naruto was straight (hell, they were convinced that Sasuke is too, even after that accident) but shouldn't he be a little softer on Sasuke? It's rare for the Uchiha to speak of his feelings at all, yet alone so… boldly.

To their utter horror Naruto continued: "And if you ever say anything like that to me _again_ I'll puke, seriously. Don't." And he seemed serious.

Shit.

That was the thought that passed through every mind in the room.

Shizune being a homophobe had gone to oh-la-la-happy-place after hearing Sasuke's first sentence. She did try to overcome her.. her disgust at two men doing… Argh!

But even she, while has covered her mouth with her right hand and using the paper stock as some teddy bear understood one thing: Sasuke will go insane. No, wait – after 10 seconds there won't be a Konoha.

Their wild imagination was cut short when the door opened revealing a serious looking Naruto (that wasn't a good sign) and a stoic Sasuke.

When the explosion didn't happen they were revealed but still very worried about Sasuke's mental health.

God, Naruto, what have you done?

Naruto acted like nothing happened. He gave a formal greeting, apologized about their tardiness.

They stared until Naruto sat on the right from Godaime to reveal a normal looking Sasuke.

'Poor guy.' Hinata wasn't a yaoi fan like Sakura or Ino (she wasn't sure about the latter because Ino denied it heatedly. Which alone was suspicious) but she did have a heart. She noticed that Neji was giving pitiful looks in Sasuke's direction as well.

Quite soon Sasuke gave a death glare to everyone in the room. The staring stopped him from sitting and now he was just getting royally pissed.

Naruto noticed and yelled: "WHAT?!" the present shinobi thought that Naruto was acting ridiculous but… He really looked lost.

"What?" he asked again and stood up.

When no one answered him so he joined Sasuke in his glaring.

Then Sakura stood up and was immediately sat back by Kakashi-sensei who additionally moved a hand over her mouth. Just so she wouldn't say anything unnecessary and since he was preoccupied he couldn't stop… Hinata.

"Naruto-kun! I'm very disappointed in you!" she scolded him.

For Naruto it was a shock. He must have done something horrible. Or they think that he did something horrible.

Hinata continued on: "Here Sasuke confessed his feelings for you and you--!"

Naruto didn't listen anymore. He what? When did Sasuke confess his feelings for him?

It seemed that Sasuke understood what they meant which made him think that maybe… Okay, he had no idea.

Hinata and others seemed to realize it too, when only Sasuke seemed to understand.

"Morons," Sasuke said but that didn't help Naruto to understand what had happened.

"What?" he whined out. Hopefully someone will explain it to him.

Tsunade frowned. Why Naruto acted like that? Did… No way, did Sasuke use his sharingan and hypnotised Naruto to forget? But he seemed so serious when he entered.

"Dobe," Sasuke called. Before he said anything more Tsunade jumped up.

"Did you cast a genjutsu on him?" she asked vehemently. Sure, she would understand, but Sasuke isn't doing anyone a favour by making it seem like nothing has happened.

At her words Naruto whipped his head at Tsunade and then back at Sasuke.

What the hell… was happening here?

"Hell no," Sasuke easily answered.

Naruto was utterly confused. Luckily, Sasuke decided to finally take pity on him and gave a hint.

"Think about what was the last thing I said."

Naruto blinked. And then it dawned on him.

"Ha-hahahahahahahahahahaaha! Oh God, for a moment you scared me. Honestly," he sighed in content. So that was it.

But he was angry at them for scaring him like that so he decided not to explain anything.

"Ah, just carry on the meeting."

-------------------

_(flashback)_

It was hard for Sasuke. It was hard for Naruto as well. They just defeated countless enemy nin and were trying to rest. In their home. Yes, they shared a home. Because Naruto got evicted and was homeless. Because Tsunade thought that living all alone in a huge mansion would make Sasuke go all psychopathic (again).

Because Sasuke would kill anyone who would share the same house he did.

Because Naruto was an equal to Sasuke and wouldn't die so easily.

Because they sort of were best friends/rivals.

Of course, there were a lot of blood and yelling before either agreed. It must have done something with the fact that they had sex with each other.

Once.

Everyone that wanted to remind or even hint at that event ended half killed by Sasuke. _Everyone._ Children were traumatised and Sasuke were forbidden to leave his house. For two months.

In case of Naruto, he would attack only ninja adults. Usually males. He couldn't hit girls. So, he asked Sasuke to do it. It was before Sasuke was locked up.

So, if, let's say, Neji or Lee, or hell, even Kazekage himself, wanted to have serious exercise then they just had to give a very small hint at that night and they'll be in for a death match.

Sasuke would try to kill them quietly. Naruto, on the opposite, would try his best to kill someone using mainly his verbal insults. And rasengan. Yeah.

But, what ever you do, don't say that when both of them are present.

Kakashi still cringes at the memories.

So, returning to the main point… It wasn't neither Naruto's nor Sasuke's fault.

They were on a mission.

Yes, if you want something bad to happen just go on a low rank mission. C-rank in this case.

They were supposed to get a scroll from someone at some stupid erotica club.

Sasuke and Naruto couldn't breathe in the heavy air but they managed to hold up.

Both did really good until Naruto threw up.

They decided to stay the night in the club private chambers.

Kakashi and Sakura, for some reason, shared another. Kakashi was already in the possession of the scroll so they weren't worried.

Naruto was worried that Sakura's shrieking will make Kakashi deaf ("And if you so as much look at me the wrong way, I'll kill you! No, I'll rip your jewels off and then…").

Too bad that it was too narrow for three men to share the same room but what else could be done.

If they left Sakura with Sasuke the latter would definitely be molested.

However, left with Naruto, Sakura would most likely be the one molested.

And, aside from Kakashi being a pervert, this choice seemed to be the best.

Either way…

When Naruto threw up he was offered a weird tasting drink and he drank a lot. Later they found out that it had, in some mysterious way, some aphrodisiac in it. With a "2 hours later" effect. So no one suspected a thing.

Sasuke was offered the same thing and after making sure that Naruto hasn't dropped dead from poisoning he took some too. It didn't taste bad.

It was a misfortune that they happened to be locked up in the same room 2 hours later.

Or that Kakashi broke the door in when he heard too many moaning from the boys' room. Seeing the situation he excused himself and let the boys finish their "bonding". He was sad that he came too early to know who will top who. Also, the next morning (after all the yelling, blood and more yelling and bruises) he couldn't tell it by the gate. Both seemed to walk normally.

He could speculate that it was Naruto because his healing abilities would be a great help. But, at the same time, he couldn't disregard the Uchiha pride. Sasuke would never limp.

Sakura blamed him, Kakashi, about not stopping them before they could get it on.

She said: "For fucks sake, you said that you saw them BEFORE everything. They were just naked, right? Why, in seven hell, you thought for that to be normal? (insert 'fucking' before every verb)"

She would have stopped them her self if she knew of such thing.

And the final "and" – Kakashi told Tsunade about it on his report who in turn told Jiraiya who told Kakashi again (not suspecting that he already knew) who currently was with Asuma who told Ino and Kurenai who told Kiba (It slipped her. But Kiba was practically begging it when he was sitting on Akamaru like that. Besides, no one that isn't a pervert should interpret words: "Don't tell me that you're going to go at it like Naruto and Sasuke?" in that way) who told his team-mates (and Hinata told Neji who told it his team-mates about it)…

In that way, everyone knew. Did I mention that Ino while sobbing told it his team-mates and that Shikamaru told Temari who let the sand know too?

Again, back to the main point, three months later when they had sex and almost destroyed the whole club after the realization had hit hard they shared the same house. Both were occupying the farthest rooms in the house and used separate bathrooms and wouldn't eat at the same time because they didn't want to be in the kitchen at the same time. After another 3 months they got over the awkwardness (and Kakashi pointed that they were being too sensitive about it. Luckily, Jiraiya was present and saved Kakashi's ass after that statement). Unfortunately, he wasn't there when Kakashi finally asked who topped. It was said earlier in the story that Kakashi still cringes at the memories.

After another month Sasuke and Naruto decided to talk about that night and both agreed that in their aphrodisiac state they would have done Gai (violent shudder) if he was present so it was in no way their fault. They also decided each to try hook up with some nice and cute girl. Then they would indulge in a lot of sexual activities to forget the traumatising event.

Which lead to the current conversation they were having now, a week after their talk. And yes, we can't forget that they are tired after beating countless enemy nin and are trying to rest in the house they are sharing now. For 3 months and a week? But who's counting.

"So, why haven't you hooked up yet? We're practically living in two different houses; with the separation wall you build so you can't say that you just have no place to bring the girls to?" Naruto asked his brow furrowing. "And with your looks it would be a piece of cake."

"…"

Sasuke usually weren't very talkative but he did sometimes talk when he was very tired because listening to Naruto was too much for him in that state.

Of course, Naruto knew it.

He repeated the question for 5 times in 3 different ways before Sasuke snapped: "I want you in my bed!"

"Eh?" Naruto shrieked horrified.

"Who says 'I want you in my bed?'" Sasuke yelled back.

"Um… you?" Naruto tried weakly.

"Che. No, you moron. I'm saying that the only girls that try to go after me are very crude and demanding. I mean, 'I want you in my bed'? What the hell!" Sasuke being the tired person that he was flailed his arms to emphasise.

Naruto seemed to finally catch on.

"So, you get turned off by some girl who said that?" he smirked. Lucky bastard. Naruto would love to hear that from a pretty girl. Wait. "She was a _pretty_ girl right?"

Sasuke gave him a look. Really. He should just run away when Naruto wants to talk to him when he was tired. Because then he couldn't put his stoic expression on that well.

He sighed and continued: "Not only that but I blushed. I BLUSHED!" He ended with another yell. "AND! And some other girls saw it. I guess they decided that I like such talks and now they always, ALWAYS pester me with such… Such _'invitations'_!"

Naruto smiled even broader. He couldn't make him understand. Okay, Sasuke decided to try again. "Don't look so happy! It's a _total_ turn off!" he claimed.

"No way." Naruto – as honest as ever.

"The (he coughed) 'invitations' get cruder every second!" Sasuke tried energetically.

And then the messenger bird flew in to notify them that they were to arrive in Hokage tower. 30 minutes ago. No one blamed the bird. It was a miracle that it got in, in the first place. After all, those traps were made by the future ANBU captain and the sixth Hokage. At least, that's what they liked to think of themselves.

Unhurriedly they went. They needed to give in their mission report too so it was very convenient.

When they were at the tower already Sasuke remembered that he hasn't made Naruto clear how disgusting those girls are so he started talking again.

"It _is_ a major turn off," he stated firmly.

Naruto who was walking ahead looked back with a 'hm?' before Sasuke's stern look reminded him about what was that. They argued quietly for 5 minutes (never stopping their journey to Hokage) until Sasuke declared: "Okay, I'll pretend to be one of the chicks and I'll even say your name so you can envision the horror and I won't even give you the worst example. So you can tell me if you would do me, I mean, that girl if you were in my situation" They stopped behind Hokage door.

"Understand?"

As Naruto nodded, he tried to remember the exact words and the exact voice of that green-head (he stopped wondering about weird hair-colours long time ago) and then, after being interrupted by Naruto's "I think." which momentary made him think 'No way, you can think?' but deemed too childish to actually say it, he started getting the act right.

"Okay, here it goes," stated Sasuke's calm voice before getting really emotional. Well, it wasn't Sasuke's fault that that girl was like that.

"Oh Naruto, I love you so much, I'll be the best hole you ever stuffed your penis, I'll drop to my knees and please you until I faint. Just say a word and I'll be yours!"

Naruto's face went to shock after hearing 'best hole' and he wondered if a girl really would go as far as to say that. But listening on, Naruto found himself amused. Imaging that Sasuke actually meant what he said he couldn't help but let out a chuckle.

That didn't stop Sasuke. In fact, he felt encouraged because _finally_ Naruto understood!

"Tonight, tomorrow, the day after tomorrow, forever! I don't care if I'm not the only one. Hell, I don't care if you spit at me!"

Naruto let out a low whistle. "That desperate?" he asked. Wow. He was feeling scared.

"All I care for is that you let me be by your side." Sasuke paused for a second. "I'll do ANYTHING!"

"Wow." Both remained silent. Then "No, no, no, no, no, no, Sasuke, never!" Naruto cried barely containing his nervous laughter. Some did manage to escape him, though. So, this was the horror Sasuke was forced to endure? No wonder he hasn't hooked up yet.

Sasuke looked pleased and then he looked like a statue with his stoic expression. Right, Sasuke doesn't want for others to see him this way.

Just to play it off completely Naruto finished: "And if you ever say anything like that to me _again_ I'll puke, seriously. Don't."

Sasuke's eyes spoke volumes. By them alone Naruto understood that Sasuke understood that he didn't want to hear from Sasuke's obsessive hookers— he meant… Uh… plainly girls?

Both were satisfied. Now Naruto took a serious face because he made a dare with Kiba that he'll be serious during meetings like these. And he's so getting those ramen coupons! So, no smiling right now. He went straight in and Sasuke followed. Naruto felt a little bit uncomfortable because everyone seemed to stare a lot more then usually when someone arrived late. He didn't let it bother him. He made the usual procedures and sat next to Tenten. He would have sat next to Sakura but ever since the… um… yeah… she has been really weird. Everyone knows that it wasn't his fault so she doesn't have to act like this. Seriously!

Looking back he noticed Sasuke glaring. It meant that he felt threatened. Why?

Then he noticed that all the previous stares were redirected to Sasuke. Right, the jerk didn't like to be stared at. Unless he did something impressive, the show-off.

Hey, was that a pity from Neji? Neji? The Neji?

But, as much he enjoyed Sasuke feeling nervous, he had to put an end to this. Simply, this enigma was driving him crazy. (How he learned this word is another interesting story but during this story I have sidetracked waay too much)

"WHAT?!" he yelled. Sasuke cringed in the inside, he betted. And now all the stares were split between him and Sasuke. Now, what the hell…

------------------------

They didn't want to but they had. So they continued or more precisely started the meeting.

They just hoped that Sasuke won't start killing suddenly.

Everybody was on their guard.

THE END ?


End file.
